Gifted Typist

Taken from the well-known expression, “crack of dawn”, this delightful little meme compares that moment when the sun peeks over the horizon of a country field and the moment when an overweight plumber’s low-slung jeans slip down another inch giving observers the magnificent moon-rise. I’ve also heard it said as “builder’s cleavage.” Whatever the expression, [...]

Keen GT readers will be pleased to hear that British Prime Minister Tony Blair has heeded advice offered by this typist. The term “War on Terror” will no longer be used by the British, according to International Development Secretary Hilary Benn who spoke at the Center on International Cooperation in New York. You may recall [...]

The world is abuzz with buzz words these days and a typist has all she can do just to keep up. The Buzz is a new series for Tuesdays. It is offered to keep you stay abreast of the latest buzzwords bombarding the language. NINJA loans: The lending industry latest offering: No Income, No Job [...]

For many years I thought an innuendo was an Italian suppository   -Spike Milligan, British comedian

Apologies again, GT visitors. Today, The Gifted Typist took another tumble down the North face of K2. This time it was an exceeded bandwidth that shut ‘er down. My excellent host Zipium has sent in the rescue squads in the form of a temporary extra bandwidth. We now trying to work out the problem. This [...]

Tell me. Who was it that came up with the idea of banning clotheslines in subdivisions, anyway? Did this person possess an aesthetic qualification to deem clotheslines unsightly? Or was this person simply afraid of the extra work and time it takes to hang clothes out in the fresh air? Perhaps this enemy of the [...]

Pop quiz: What is an eggcorn? A misspelling? Or a word that defines the way our language evolves. Well, if you said both, you’d be right. Eggcorn is indeed a mispelling of acorn, the thing that falls off a tree. Over the years, it has been misheard, mistaken and misspelled as eggcorn. But is this [...]

Getting tired of the Canadian winter? Feeling entitled to no snow in April? Well here’s something to consider: the poor migrating birds who landed here in April expecting spring. Now they’re sitting in the trees looking at the falling snow covering their food. And all that frenzied tweeting you hear? That’s the wife bird giving [...]

Perhaps someone can help me here. I’m having some trouble deciding whether I’m suffering a case of cynicism and just plain dumb old reality. I’m thinking about the strange story of the stowaways who didn’t materialize on the Cypriot-registered ship in Halifax this week. Odd though this story may be, I’m not cynical about it, [...]

IMglish is about finding things out and finding them out fast. And if you really need to know what Jesus would do… there’s an Imglishism for that too. WC                          who cares? WWJD                   what would Jesus do? WYSITWIRL      what you see is totally worthless in real life WTH                      what/who the heck WYI                       when you in? WUF                      [...]

Anniversaries are like toilets – men usually manage to miss them – Jo Brand, British comedienne

Will be back in stenopool Monday.

Here’s a problem for the 21st-century odd ball: getting your iPod bud to stay in your ear. Go here for more on this bewildering problem.

Given all the buzz around reviving 2014 Commonwealth Games bid, The Gifted Typist has come up with a proposal that would allow Halifax to host the games AND  satisfy budget constraints. Highlights include: develop Athlete’s Village on Halifax Commons using second-hand tents from Ron’s Army/Navy and plenty of tarpaulin to protect grass. dig moat around [...]

Past Posts on translations (3) Limpid beer, strict rotation, beef rashers beaten up, execute customers? I’ve been on airlines – no names mentioned – that embody this experience. Here is your next crop of bad translations. On a menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm’s own make; limpid red beer soup with cheesy dumplings [...]