Gifted Typist

See column here. There are moments when Christmas seems more like a stint in Guantanamo Bay than the Christmas songs you hear on the radio. Comfort and joy? Ha! I realized this the other day while standing in “the line-up that had no end.” I did not want to be in the big box and [...]

One of my favourite seasonal activities in sending and receiving Christmas cards. I love finding an envelope in the mailbox that is not: a. a bill b. a pitch from a charity I’ve never heard of c. a tax-funded newsletter from a politician who wants to let me know all the things she/he is doing [...]

It’s goofy, crowded, poorly lit and long. The singing isn’t always tuneful. The dancing can be poorly choreographed and the newly -formed Grade six band often sounds like a dying cat trying to hum Christmas carols. The seats aren’t comfortable, the view is bad and the lead-up is stressful as you try to find smart [...]

We’ve just had a snow storm. It’s an east coast type of storm – indecisive, wringing its hands over whether it should snow, sleet or rain. As a result we get a charming mixture of watery slush, snow and ice. This morning the radio announcers trilled that up to 20 cms of snow fell in [...]

It is said that football ((NAmerican translation: football = soccer) is a gentlemen’s game played by louts and rugby is a lout’s game played by gentlemen. It is also said that Canada is a land of nice people. So, in light of the recent brawl that erupted amongst eight-year olds at a minor hockey game, [...]

Big retailers are making a lot of easy money from unredeemed gift cards. People lose them. People forget about them. People take them to the store only to discover that the expiry date has passed. People don’t spend them all the way down because there is nothing in the store for $12.62. And where does [...]

This morning I flipped on CBC radio and heard a grown man cry. No-one had died. The man’s village had not been devastated by a massive earthquake. He had not lost his job or discovered that his wife was cheating on him. No, this man was crying because the Canadian football team he supports did [...]

I had to wonder what was up a couple of weeks ago when I went out to do my Halloween shopping and found the store heaving with plastic elves and fake trees. Go here for the column. What’s going on? All the Halloween stuff had been cleared away for Christmas and Joy to the World [...]

I met Pat in September when I started a weekly art class. I was the newbie and Pat extended herself to me on the first day, offering a friendly smile and welcoming questions about how long I’d been painting and how I managed to find my way into the popular class. By the second week, [...]

Where I live, city politicians organize big rock concerts. (I know. I know.) Last year we had the Rolling Stones play in an outdoor venue. It was raining cats and dogs, but devoted fans were defiant and stood in the mucky trenches for hours, wringing every drop out of the show. It was fantastic. This [...]

You know that TV commercial that shows the people screaming in horror as they spot the first fallen leaf at the end of summer. This happened to me this week, only it was much worse than a fallen leaf. It was ….. oh dear God no, not…. CHRISTMAS! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I’m afraid it’s true. The flickering [...]

This typist is calling for a boycott of bookstores and publishers that are ripping off the Canadian book-buying public by failing to adjust prices to reflect current exchange rates. On the weekend, I slammed down a computer book and walked out of a Chapters bookstore to protest the differential. With the Canadian dollar worth $1.02 [...]

I didn’t until I walked into Starbucks one day and made the mistake of ordering a “small” cappuccino. The roll of the eyes on the waiter – oops, barista – said it all: “Don’t ‘cha you know?” he seemed to be saying. “Tall is the new small.” Of course. Silly me. This is Starbucks. Why [...]

This being Thanksgiving, we’re preparing to tuck into a nice Thanksgiving cedar-planked salmon. It’s a lovely piece of salmon marinaded in a bewitching cocktail and then barbecued on a soaked plank of cedar. The sweetness of the cedar smoke infuses the fish with a rich perfumey essence that is to die for. At Christmas, we [...]

I keep hearing the word “community” being used in new and creative ways. We have the “international community” reacting to the crackdown in Burma. We have the “gaming community” embracing Halo3. And last week I heard a reference to the “Halo3 community.” I’m not sure what the Halo3 community was doing but I’d hazard a [...]