Gifted Typist

Silver for 25 Gold for 50 But what is the precious metal for #18 I just – just!- remembered that today was the day. Eek. Maybe the precious thing for #18 should be a memory boost.

It began innocently enough as a crumbling concrete front step and now it’s become a sort of Paschendale in my front yard. The front step might have been done on it own, but there was also the driveway, so poorly engineered that people have actually slipped under their parked car in the winter due to [...]

I’ve been busily booking the little typists into summer camps these past weeks. Interesting things:  outdoor camp, flash animation, drama. The other day I heard a geriatric psychiatrist on the radio talking about the importance of keeping adult brains exercised. Apparently, it helps avoid cognitive decline. So why don’t they have adult summer camps. Not [...]

While exfoliating with my Apricot Scrub the other day, I noticed the french word for exfoliant: Desincrustant. I never really thought of exfoliating as disincrusting. But I supposed that’s what you are doing: removing that layer of crust that builds up on your face. That is why the skin on your face seems so soft [...]

… I tied the knot. We had a sulu-wearing Methodist minister. Very earnest. And five or six sulu-wearing “guests” who were Shanghai’ed in for the job. They were actually the bar and kitchen  staff at the little hotel where we were staying. The boss organized the minster for us and attendance for the bar staff [...]

I hit the pool yesterday for the first time in 10 days. I wasn’t expecting it to be too painful.  Sure I had a few days off, but I was skiing and dog sledding.  Surely that would keep me fit. Ha. Hahahahaha. How wrong I was. It felt like there was no oxygen in the [...]

How did the blond break his leg raking leaves? He fell out of the tree. How do you change a blond’s mind? Blow in his ear. How do you keep a blond busy all day? Write “please turn over” on both sides of a piece of paper How do you make a blond laugh on [...]

… “I got a bad case of ….” well …. groin injury? Robert Palmer’s original lyrics “…of lovin’ you” sound so much better. And it probably feels better too. And “groin injury” really doesn’t describe the 20,000 volt shots of pain going through me every time I move. It all started yesterday afternoon after work. [...]

This meme is going around on blogs and Facebook so I thought I’d have a go. It’s a no-tag meme but anyone can feel free hop on. 1. I’m fascinated – no, really! -by heating systems in buildings. The poor furnace maintenance guys have no idea what they’re in for when they come to my [...]

Just took a peek downstairs. Cookies are gone. Bourbon’s been slurped. Presents are all under the tree. Stockings are stuffed. Guess who’s been and gone. Missed him again! Dang. Merry ho ho to everyone. And to everyone a good night.

(This one’s doing the rounds. It’s cute.) Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay [...]

I managed to swim 40 metres on held breath during “lung-buster drills” in swim training this morning. (That’s 4/5ths of an Olympic-sized pool.) It took me 37 stokes. Freestyle. I repeated that count three times in three separate drills. Never more than 37.  Never less. It’s a record for me. My previous record was 34 [...]

Did any other Canadians have trouble sorting out the red/blue colour coding in the US election coverage? In Canada red is the colour of the more progressive Liberal party. Blue is the colour of the more conservative Conservative party. In the US those colours are opposite with red representing the conservative Republicans and blue the [...]

See my Herald column over here. They are all around. They are the undead. And they want to suck the life and vitality out of you. We all have energy vampires in our lives: they come in the form of friends, in-laws, ex-spouses and co-workers. They wear you down, exhaust you, force you to surrender. [...]

I spotted these tulips in late spring. They were growing at the entrance of my city’s lovely Victorian Public Gardens. A few shots from below and a bit whiz-bam-bang with Photoshop and the Victorian charm is transformed into the 21st-century funky.