Gifted Typist

Twitter is for people you want to get to know.

That is why I prefer Twitter to Facebook.

That is also why I couldn’t give two hoots about Facebook’s new look.

…my 13 year old looked at them and said : they’re old men.

Ahhhh, yuf.

See my Friday Herald column here.

By now we all know that Mac is cool, and good.

And we know that PCs are uncool and virus-ridden.

But the Mac marketing “We’re better than you PC” onslaught is getting a little tiresome.

People who try too hard to be cool can end up looking like fools.

Tone it down Mac, and maybe us poor uncool sods still using the PC might think about switching over.

On Saturday I worked out for six hours. The event was called Bustamove or BAM.

There were about 750 of us on the floor of the Metro Centre doing yoga, zumba, pilates and everything else.

We set two world records that have been accepted by the Guinness people.

And we sweated with none other than Richard Simmons, the fitness guru.

It was all in the name of raising money for a digital mammography machine for the early detection of breast cancer.

The day was long but fun.

By the end, I felt more more tired mentally than physically.

The world records were for the biggest 10 second hug and the longest line of continuous massage. Think conga. Goofy but fun.

I was part of a team called the Halifaxchicks, an assembly of women who met through Twitter. We raised money together through pancake breakfasts, pub crawls and on the streets in brazen charm offensives.

We also raised money individually and on-line. We raised over $11,000 between the 11 of us.

Not bad for a day’s workout.

My friend and team mate Shelagh has some pictures of our team and the day.

See if you can spot the typist in the group pix.

Visit my column here.

They say women fight like cats, but what about those late night talk show hosts.

By the end up that dust-up they were clawing each other’s eyes out.

Sharp barbs, low blows, personal insults.

I’m still picking the fur balls out of my computer, TV and eyeballs.

Meee-owwww, boyz.

53.

The youngest typist received his coveted cell phone for his 11th birthday.

There was debate over whether he is too young, but it was decided the texting function is good for family communication, especially during periods of separation due to business travel.

He received his gift on Saturday and on Sunday promptly lost it while tobogganing down the hill at the school. He placed it in a hat for safe keeping and someone took the hat by mistake.

It was an honest mistake, but one that caused a tirade of self-recrimination by the young typist who felt stupid for losing his phone so quickly.

This typist shared his burden. I should have put stricter boundaries his movements with the phone. I should have had “the talk” about responsibility etc.

First, he had to accept the loss. This was not easy, like swallowing a watermelon whole.

Then we came up with a cost-sharing plan to buy another phone. The second phone would not have incentives given to you the first time. It would be expensive.

It was a tough one to get over, the lessons bitter to the taste, but the little typist struggled through and was starting to come out the other end of his disappointment.

That is when the phone rang: “You don’t know me but I found this cell phone on the hill by the school.”

The little typist saw the relief on my face. It spread to his as he jumped out of his seat and mimicked a phone shape with his thumb and finger, his watery eyes hopeful and bright. He jump for joy and ran to tell his sister.

Phone Lost. Hard lesson learned. And found again.

How sweet.

Go to my Friday column here.

He’s coming to this parts next week

Richard Simmons is a character you can’t ignore.

For years, he’s been in our faces fighting fat, which has been a personal demon for him since he was young.

In his battle, he’s lost over 100 pounds and gone on to start a fitness movement for people who are overweight.

He’s written books, produced 50 exercise videos and appeared in soap operas and talk shows.

This typist will be working out with him next Saturday during the Bustamove fundraiser for breast cancer.

He will be the last hour in the six-hour workout.

To donate to this cause, go here.

That is the question.

Sounds funny, but it isn’t. (Actually, it’s hilarious.)

Here’s the deal. This typist is prone to the occasional cold sore.

It is located on my top lip and now healing.

But when I smile the scab is pulled and opens up, causing a gush of my exquisitely rare AB-.

So when I greet people, it is with a stony face, the natural  smile carefully suppressed so as not to subject them to a blood letting.

I have attempted to explain, but getting into those details with a casual acquaintance or in a meeting is, well, awkward.

So what do you do?

Smile with abandon and bleed?

Remain stoic and statuesque?

Climb under a rock till the sore heals?

This typist lost a dear friend on the weekend.

Mike was a travel journalist, a biologist, an environmental consultant, a rock climber and a photographer, among many other things.

He inspired this typist in many ways. And he always laughed at my jokes.

About 18 months ago he was diagnosed with Motor Neurone Disease, a condition that took his body but not his mind.

On our recent trip to England for Christmas, I visited Mike. His body had deteriorated but  his mind shone bright.

We laughed and joked and talked about his condition.

We all knew that time was short. And it was.

But at least I got to say goodbye to a good friend.

Rest well, Mike

You were a good one.

See my herald column here.

On January 30, I’ll be doing the six-hour “Bustamove” workout  for Jann and Lin.

They were two friends from the UK lost to breast cancer in 2003.

I still miss them.

Bustamove is a fundraiser to purchase digital mammography equipment. A thousand people will gather for six one-hour workouts in one day.

It will be a challenge, but it’ll be worth it if we can raise the money.

Help me raise money for the cause.

Visit my Bustamove page to make a donation.

This typist visited Haiti a few months ago, not Port-au-Prince, but another part.

I spoke to locals and saw the children playing in the water. It was a happy day, everyone was smiling, no one was suffering.

Looking at the pictures of Port-au-Prince after the earthquake is heart wrenching.

This little country has been beaten down by natural disaster and political corruption, and now this.

You have to wonder how much more it can take.

Because I’ve been away for a few weeks, there’s been no swimming.

So the first fly set this morning was met with a combination of fear and loathing.

So I took a deep breath, wore flippers and gave it my all.

And guess what?

It wasn’t so bad. I wasn’t as unfit as I thought.

That has to be a good sign for 2010. Doesn’t it?

Here is a link to a previous fly set in the fall of 2009.

What news to receive after spending three weeks in frosty Blighty. I was there for three weeks at Xmas.

Wossy, as he’s known on Twitter, was one of my fave things about Britain during my 7 years residence. Still is.

He is devastatingly funny, has a rapier-like wit and delivers a comeback with lightning speed. Nothing in Canadian comedy comes even close.

He does a Friday Night with Jonathan Ross chat show on TV, a Film show and a Saturday morning radio show on BBC Radio 2.

But his edginess has got him in trouble. Last year with Ross and fellow Brit comedian Russell Brand made lewd phone calls to the answering machine of the grand daughter of Andrew Sacks who played Manuel on Fawlty Towers. Brand played it on his BBC radio show and all hell broke loss.

And then there was Ross’ contract, a cool £18 over three years. This bothered many people in Britain who felt this was too much for a public broadcaster to pay one star while it was laying off journalists and other staff.

There were rumours that the BBC wouldn’t renew his contract so Ross jumped first.

Whatever the story, I liked him because he was genuinely funny and had a talent for making me laugh till it hurt.

He’ll complete the last six months of his contract and then he’ll be a free agent.

Let’s hope his next phase will bring more of Jonathan Ross’s unique talent to these shores.

In swimming, we call it spinning.

That’s when you are sprinting so hard that your arms and legs start going faster than they should be to maximize your potential speed.

I’ve been known to spin in time trials, but i’m working on lengthening out my stroke to harness the power.

In my life as a typist, I’ve been spinning a lot lately.

Too much work, not enough time.

Throw Christmas into the picture and a gifted typist becomes a spinning typist.

Things suffer, like this blog and my visits to your blogs.

Ach!

Hate that.

I’m thinking it’s just a phase. And if it isn’t a phase, then I’d better make some changes soon.

Anyway, just to say I’m not gone, just spinning.

And I hope to lengthen out those stokes and get some good momentum and balance going soon.